Why can't anyone ever dine in peace? Always such loud music. We could fix this.

My idea is for a restaurant where silence is mandatory.

Operationally it wouldn't be that hard to run. You would just have order cards at each table and those half pencils you find at libraries or golf courses.

Next, in order to avoid noisy trays and tray stands you would use a pretty silent roller cart to run food out to the tables. The cart would have a rubber mat on top so when plates are loaded onto it the sound would be deadend. To keep the roller cart from making noise you would also tile the back in smooth marble. You also would have a computer telling a worker exactly which plate to load onto which cart when graphically, reducing the need for staff to communicate what is ready. This also means you can carry out more than one table's order per trip. Computers direct everything so staff don't need to communicate to solve problems or make decisions among themselves.

Speaking of technology. We don't want to waste a staff member on observing guests to make sure they stay silent. Instead we will have a series of directional mics in the room. Using a bit of software we will be able to detect the location and volume of any noise. This will give an alert to staff if someone meets the threshold for removal. Because all staff will have access to a mobile computer all will be alerted at the same time.

Of course they will have to remove him silently. You will need staff that are trained to lower plates silently, to address concerns using both sign language and general charades if a customer doesn't know ASL, and importantly be familiar with applying a gag quickly. This will keep the period of commotion brief if there is a removal.

Marketing:

It's important to find the right target audience. One nice thing about a silent restaurant is it makes it a good environment to get some work done, as long as they don't use a keyboard. You would want to market to professionals who might appreciate a moment of silence to think about their work if their office doesn't really give them that.

There may be some use in handing out fliers near libraries.

Opening a location directly next to a book store would be pretty ideal because you could get a large volume of traffic from people who have just bought a book and want to enjoy a meal and a read.

The alternative good location would be somewhere scenic and serene. You might be able to charge more for that experience because it would be unique but it likely wouldn't compensate for the increased traffic you would get in a city next to a bookstore.

Merch potential:

It's a good idea to sell some retail at the front. Obvious things to sell would be books, newspapers, reading tablets, t-shirts that aren't quite funny enough to make someone laugh audibly. Just the obvious things. Sudoku books.